I’ve got this theory – that the Universe keeps everything in perfect balance. You let stuff flow out of your life and new stuff arrives to fill the void.
Today I made a decision about my “contribution” – about how I want to help to contribute to my community. A long conversation over two lovely coffees with a local Mummy Mate and I easily came to a wonderful and elegant solution – it suddenly felt like I had a direction to head in that ticked all of my boxes.
And when we got home – the doorbell went ………………..
It’s like Christmas isn’t it???
So I was having a chat online with our Victoria and was complaining about how it looked like February out there. Seriously!!! I should be looking forward to crisp salads and park picnics ………………. instead I was craving – this:
Mmmmmm!!! But I didn’t pull my wellies on and head out to the shops, instead I “shopped from home” by heading for my store cupboard to make up a jar of “Cream of Something Soup Mix”.
Shocking how the days have just drifted by!!
I kept meaning to pop in and write – but every time I tried to sit down and come up with some words a huge wave of weariness would engulf me and I would retire to hiding under the duvet with a promise of “Tomorrow!!!”
I’d love to announce that I have been up to magical things – but the reality is that apart from feeding the boys and attempting the very basics of keeping body and soul together I have done absolutely sod all.
Turns out that they weren’t kidding that recuperation from the operation was 12 weeks ………………… and here was me convinced I could do it in three and be back to normal. And being still, combined with some tablets that I have been prescribed has resulted in a monster visit from our old friend the Black Dog.
Depression has reigned supreme Chez MFin3 ……………………..sucks doesn’t it??
I have been blessed by a set of parents that when the going gets tough – they get going. They swing into coping mode and believe that “keeping busy” is the solution to most problems in life.
One phone call to my Mum when my disk prolapsed had her wielding her bus pass and picking up the reins of keeping my home and family together -she was completely NOT phased by the practicalities of intimately nursing her adult daughter (and I frankly just had to suck it up and put my big girl knickers on)
My Dad – well he is a typical Scots Dad. I know he love me – but we never say it to one another ………………….. its not that I can’t say it, my boys hear me say that all the time (much to the big ones secret delight and public embarrassment LOL). He is the silent, non demonstrative type …………. you know the kind I mean?
So let me share with what he did when I was so poorly …………….. how he found a way to cope with the stress of working and living ten miles away from us through the week ………………….. see what he did for me and the boys during his weekends with us …………………….. he didn’t just turf up and proffer me a bunch of flowers and a “get well soon” card …………………….. he made us a whole gardenBTW you can thank my Mum for the photos – whenever my Dad did something she would take a photo on my camera and come inside to show me what I could hear happening from my sick-bed.
Feeling fabulous today …………. yesterday I shivered through what must have been me detoxing from all the pain meds, but today I suddenly feel like everything is falling back into place.
Even wrote a menu plan and everything …………. 7 days worth – Yay!!! Cos you know how I love me a good plan LOL. Back to the basics because we know however simple it is it really does work.
But a lovely thing happened today -but I need your help figuring out how to take advantage of a totally amazing opportunity.
I have been offered a car!!!!
You know – four wheels, an engine and a way of getting the red-headed one to school without walking him six miles a day!!!
How totally amazing that one of our lovely ladies is getting a four-door to accommodate an imminent visit by the Stork and has made this out of the blue offer!!
Its a bit like this:
I need to get it from London to Scotland in the next few of weeks …………. and I am not cleared for driving yet!!!
TBH, even though I think I would be safe enough with my hands I know I wouldn’t be able to make an emergency stop and I think I might get lynched by my own knitting if I even thought about driving a car 500 miles whilst my back is healing.
So does anyone know anyone who is heading north and would like to drive? Would anyone be able to help me move it out of London to somewhere out of the way till I am better?
Anyone got any suggestions of how I can do my part to make this total miracle happen for the wee man?
Fingers crossed that you lovelies can help me find a practical solution!!
Hello my lovelies
Last Monday at lunchtime I finally got my MRI Scan and by teatime I was prepped and in theatre……..it all happened so very fast in the end – in fact I felt like I was a cast member of Holby City for a while there.
Turns out that the excruciating pain I was in was caused by a prolapsed disk very far down the base of my spine – probably caused by a fall I had some twenty years ago as a Stage Manager.
It all happened in such a blur I wasn’t give a pre-med as I was still signing all consents just before I went in…… lovely Anesthesiologist though – although I did request that seeing as I was going to be face down for the duration that he do a wee bum lift whilst they were at it ………………but well you know, NHS cuts doncha know
Three hours later I was back on the ward – called my Mum (lovely husky voice caused by intubation) and had my dinner (packed one courtesy of my Mum …. well you can’ live on hospital food can you??)
I have got five teeny holes in my bahookie – and I mean teeny as the surgery was done laparoscopically. So I got home mid week (and in a far shorter time than the five hours it took to get me into hospital the previous Friday I hasten to add)
Stitches are to come out on Wednesday ………………….. but I am in NO PAIN!!! Absolutely none, in fact I am not on so much as a paracetamol. Spent a few wibbly days but am now off the Oxycontin (that are worth so much apparently although I can’t see the fascination as they didn’t make me feel fabulous at all ). Maybe you are supposed to combine them with something other than hospital tea to get a high off of them ??
In fact -now I am not in any pain I can look back and realise just how much my life has been curtailed over the last couple of years……………. today I celebrated by putting on my own socks for the first time in 12 weeks
So having spent a few days shivering through the anesthetic hangover and got myself detoxed from the codeine I was actually able to sit up tonight and watch my old school-mate on Dr Who. Now I know that Dougray is really famous instead of playing all these Hollywood block-busters he has appeared in a genuinely iconic programme LOL.
So I have a fairly long recuperation period ahead – about another 12 weeks, but then as the Surgeon pointed out it was still spinal surgery even though the wounds are tiny.
So my Mum is still here taking care of us all – but every day I shall get more mobile. It would seem that I have escaped this with mild nerve damage to my outer fingers (pinkie and ring finger) but they are hopeful the sensation will return ……………….. but I may never play violin ever again LOL. Oh!! and apparently will never run a marathon ………………… cos we all know that was on the cards don’t we Physio has suggested knitting as therapy
I so hope you guys are all well – and now that I can think in a straight line again I hope to be able to draw up the strings of this place and start getting going again…………… specially our Africa project.
In closing I have just one thing to say ………………. thank F**k for the Emergency Fund.
I spoke to Elaine this afternoon and she is still battling the pain with a little help from some medicines and a lot of help from her Mum.
Stoned is not the word although she was still fairly compus mentus…
At least she made sense to me.
She will go for her MRI tomorrow (Friday) and I will keep you posted as soon as I know.
Meanwhile keep her in your thoughts and prayers, as she is in ours.
Im still alive but still face down in the recovery position which means my sores are still pretty darn sore.
Good news is that the pain relief is sorted so although immobile I am not in too much pain. Mind you that means that I have about twenty minutes of lucidity per day and as for the rest? Well face it – stoned is the only word to describe it really.
My ” emergency MRI” might be tomorrow. My Mum has had a royal battle trying to organise transportation.
Can I catch a bus? Erm!!! No nope!!
Passenger Bus has a seat – just the one though. Seeing as I can’t sit am too out of it to follow cbeebies we didnt think that was a solution LOL
Cant offer you an ambulance as my appointment is twenty minutes after their cut off time “What do you want me to do – stay on late for your daughter?” asked the controller. Well you can guess my Mothers reaction to that one cant you???
So proper ambulance should be here tomorrow afternoon.
So after two weeks of home nursing I have persuaded Mum to pack me . a hospital bag and if she feels it right that she is to leave me at Ninewells tomorrow. She is a star but I feel the more she copes the more they will let her cope ………… and what we really need is to find out whats wrong and get me . mobile…. not just deal . with the pain.
I think with all the travel and movement tomorrow I will probably be doped up to the eyeballs but if I can I will let Victoria know how I get on and she can fill you in. Do wards have broadband these days?
Sorry its not better news …….. and this lying in bed is not getting my veggie garden planted either. So bored . I could chew my own arm off.
Laters ladies xxxx
Still unable to get up but physiotherapist is due at two to give it a good try.
They are getting worried at the surgery – well they never really see me except for spitting out the babies LOL. In fact that is what really has them worried as when I say that pain is at level 8 they know I am comparing it to natural childbirth
Mum is taking the boys out whilst the pysio is in – really dont want them hearing or seeing their Mum in pain – but dont worry as my lodger is here today and he is a nurse.
Hope I do get up because physically I am a real mess. I am growing a gorgeous set of pressure sores and despite lots of fruit and water ……. well lets say nothing has happened in 9 days. I know. TMI
Best news is that they have now sorted out some pain relief tbat doesnt leave me too trippy – although I am now on some stuff that I could make a fortune selling on the street.
Bad news is that I am booked for an emergency MRI so an ambulance could arrive at any moment to whisk me away …………. which makes me think they might think there is a larger problem to deal. But hey. On my budget a day out . is a day out isnt it?
Hope you guys are frugalling away …… at least from here there is no temptation to spend any money LOL
PS daytime telly still sucks